hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
So I just went to clothing optional bar
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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