i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
You ate ashes out of my bong
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Randomize
