I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
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You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
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