He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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