sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Just puked most of my soul out..
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