I wannas sexs uuuuu
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
