doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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