he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
