wat bout pragnant strippers??
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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