please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Even my vagina gasped.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize