Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize