hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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