I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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