using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
