seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
