So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
you would pick up someone in the library
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
