So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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