She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I am mentally ready for anal.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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