i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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