Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I will die if light touches me.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
