10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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