im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
this just has baby written all over it
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Randomize
