i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
