I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
there was a trapeze. enough said
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
God I need to hump something, right now.
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