I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
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