me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
