Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize