ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
i now understand why vodka
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
