i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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