SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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