I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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