their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
