think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
