I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
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