dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
