READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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