I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
