That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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