Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
