i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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