Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize
