If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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