She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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