WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Randomize
