And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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