U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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