i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
