i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
