Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
