We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
We are two peas in an std pod
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize
