i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
