Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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